HELP! any typing i do on my comp is screwed

[lamar]

as always microsoft tect support is technically correct
but not helpful (as im sure youve all heard the joke with
the helicopter) anyway... anything i type on my other
computer is berserk
for example i type the character t and it puts ft in the
doc and it does this with most the characters and i know
its not a language setting because not only have i
checked it but the backspace only works when i highlight
characters and then push backspace otherwise it acts like
it wants to be normal and put only what i type but i
think a virus of some sort is forcing it to do it... i
downloaded 3 things online the day before and between
installation and this evening nothing has been acting up.
just so you know, the 3 things i downloaded were
1.simpsons background (from screensaver.com)
2.game maker (from download.com)
3.diablo ii hack (from download.com)
the problem isnt just in office programs either, its
affecting my games, renaming files, messager, and ALL
other things i the keyboard with
any ideas and suggestions are appreciated and i dont care
how advanced you get just so long as its step by step
i'm willing to bet im not the only one with this problem
so microcrap and their via team should get on it
no offence micro but the joke is true (i didnt even email
you guys on this cuz none of your email support things
were working for me)
LINUX ALL THE WAY SECURE, EAZY, MORE OPEN, BETTER
FEATURES, AND IN THE SAME DAY ANY PROBLEM THATS NOTICED
IS FIXED
ps: if you spam my yahoo acct thats fine cuz its a
temporary address until i get my comp fixed

 

[lamar]

p.s. if you havent heard the joke about microsoft
techsupport it goes something like this
2 expirianced helicopter pilots where flying in seatle (i
think, might be wrong though) when a freak and sudden
storm came. thick fog filled the air and the pilot could
only see a few 100 feet. his communications were disabled
along with all his gps and other electronics. he flew to
a tall building and had the co-pilot make a big sign
saying "where are we?" when the co-pilot finished and
held up the sign the people in the building made a sign
saying "in a helicopter" the pilot landed safly at the
helicopter pad in thick fog that had grown even denser,
with this everyone was amazed and all the other pilots
asked "how'd you know where the airport was?"
his answer was simple "well i knew where i was because i
found the microsoft building all thanks to the
technically correct yet not very helful 'help' they gave
me and from there i Knew where the airport should be
about"

 

[Confused]

Let's see if we all understand this correctly

1.) You broke your compute
2.) You lack the technical knowledge to fix what you brok
3.) You insult the tech support team of the company of the software that YOU brok
4.) You tell a bad (not really funny) joke about the company that you are asking help fro

I think that the best plan of attack for you at this point is to format your hard drive, install LINUX and one of the many free office suites that are available for the technically challenged like yourself, and let the fine folks that monitor this board attend to more important matters. The people here are knowledgeable about the product and very helpful and let’s face it… you can’t beat the price

Don’t look a gifted horse in the mouth

 

[Milly Staples [MVP - Outlook]]

Yeah, Linux OSS fixed in one day... Sendmail anyone???

--
Milly Staples [MVP - Outlook]

Post all replies to the group to keep the discussion intact. Due to
the (insert latest virus name here) virus, all mail sent to my personal
account will be deleted without reading.

After searching google.groups.com and finding no answer, lamar asked:

| as always microsoft tect support is technically correct
| but not helpful (as im sure youve all heard the joke with
| the helicopter) anyway... anything i type on my other
| computer is berserk
| for example i type the character t and it puts ft in the
| doc and it does this with most the characters and i know
| its not a language setting because not only have i
| checked it but the backspace only works when i highlight
| characters and then push backspace otherwise it acts like
| it wants to be normal and put only what i type but i
| think a virus of some sort is forcing it to do it... i
| downloaded 3 things online the day before and between
| installation and this evening nothing has been acting up.
| just so you know, the 3 things i downloaded were
| 1.simpsons background (from screensaver.com)
| 2.game maker (from download.com)
| 3.diablo ii hack (from download.com)
| the problem isnt just in office programs either, its
| affecting my games, renaming files, messager, and ALL
| other things i the keyboard with
| any ideas and suggestions are appreciated and i dont care
| how advanced you get just so long as its step by step
| i'm willing to bet im not the only one with this problem
| so microcrap and their via team should get on it
| no offence micro but the joke is true (i didnt even email
| you guys on this cuz none of your email support things
| were working for me)
| LINUX ALL THE WAY SECURE, EAZY, MORE OPEN, BETTER
| FEATURES, AND IN THE SAME DAY ANY PROBLEM THATS NOTICED
| IS FIXED
| ps: if you spam my yahoo acct thats fine cuz its a
| temporary address until i get my comp fixed